Iceology of 2012

First off.... I don't like the new set up for this site.... I've created a new "Blog" post site... area... SOMETHING and do not know HOW to delete it!!! ARGH!!!!


Okay now on to last night...


Had a FANTASTIC  time with a rather large group of friends at Dave N' Busters last night. However, may not have been the most wisest decisions because of the horrific ice storm last night. But none the less had a great time with some pretty amazing people, as well made a new friend... Paul Nichols. 

I unfortunately was terrified of the ice falling so I left at 10 PM... pretty much mid conversation or "hanging out" with my friends and new friend. I felt bad... but once I got on the road.... I was driving in a total NIGHTMARE!!


Those who know me, know that cars have a conspiracy against me. I'm, I guess you could say, famous for wrecking cars... in so many words. This was NOT my play tonight!!!

Like I said above I left D&B at 10 PM... I took Princeton Glendale (St Rt 747) to HWY 129. I had planned to by pass all the resounding chances at crashing into the Miami River on Liberty Fairfield, or putting my car in ditch on St Rt 73 (or anywhere else that it's extremely windy or hilly of a road). But, as I'm coming into Hamilton at the light with 129 and Hampshire Dr... it is TOTALLY lit up with red tail lights of stopped cars!!! I sat there for 15 minutes... didn't move an INCH... at a total stand still. So I turned onto Hampshire Dr then on to Princeton road. Worse decision ever!!! By now it's past 10:30 PM and I'm still in my car... sliding on ice!! I'm on Princeton just before Rose Hill Cemetery and I see on the opposite side of the road as me two cars inverted in the ditch (making a "V" shape with both cars). I'm thinking to myself... gosh that's gotta suck!! I start pleading with the Lord to get me home safe... 

The car infront of me has been stopped now for a good 5 minutes. I'm hearing this squealing noise and seeing smoke coming from their tires (mind you I'm about 2 car lengths from this van infront of me). I want to keep a SAFE distance from all of the motor vehicles so that I'm not forced into an accident that will be out of my hands and control (yet again... my accident in August). Since I've been pretty much stopped... I too start attempting to go... and my tires just spin... as well as the van's. 

By now it's creeping up on 11 PM. For a SOLID 10-15 minutes I'm scooting in my car as if it will help my car go any further on pavement that is covered in ice... yeah didn't help at all. It took me this amount of time to go maybe 20 yards? I finally come up on New Life Vineyard's parking lot, and think to myself, "Maybe if I get here I'll be safe?" then think, "Crap it's COLD out... and I don't want to sleep in my car?!"

So my pleading with God earlier to get me home safely soon turned into.... "God, please just get me to Walmart so I'll be warm, out of my car, and most of all SAFE?!" 

At about 11:15ish I pull into Walmart's parking lot!!! PRASIE GOD I'M SAFE!!!! I walk into the store and has this tall man who had salt & pepper hair if it was ok for me to hang out for a few hours to "wait" out the storm. I was told it was okay. So I grabbed me some magazines and grabbed a seat at the "Jackson Hewlett"  tax tables by the vision center. Then an employee of the store asked me if I wanted one of her cold coffee drinks. She explained to me that she purchased a 4 pack and wanted to give me one. She apologized that I wasn't able to get home. I told her that I would rather be safe, and know I was safe then try to drive home in that stuff (pointing outside). She told me that I could sit in their break room and watch TV, but I told her I would be fine sitting where I was and thanked her.


At about 12:30 AM I go out to the parking lot to see if things had calmed down or gotten worse.... It was like the entire parking lot was SOLID WHITE.... SERIOUSLY!!! Even with the lights in the lot on... could barely make out my yellow car.... and it's not because the glasses I'm wearing aren't the right script.  It was ice that was falling... not even in rain drop form... ice... white ice!!! CRAZINESS!!!!


So I go back to my borrowed chair and read some more magazines.... US Weekly, People, Cosmopolitan, OK... and a few others. At about 2:30 I go to see if it's let up, as well as as a few customers who were walking in... yes customers coming to shop at 2 in the morning... how the roads were. They told me as long as I took things slow it was ok. 


I made the decision that my bed sounded a lot better than this chair in a well lit store. I went and started my car to heat it up to help get the ice off of it. I soon remember that I only have one glove in my pocket... after two minutes of cleaning off the ice I make a decision to go get a pair of gloves. On my way back in to the store I ask a different gentlemen to watch my car to make sure someone didn't get into it or steal it. HA HA HA.... Frosty is going to take my car!! HA HA HA LOL


Okay get my gloves, clear my car... what next? How am I going to get home?


If I went Liberty Fairfield I would run the chance of loosing control of my car on the bridge and crashing into the Miami River... or going around some bends & hills in/on the road on St Rt 73 and put me in a ditch. 


I went right on Princeton Rd., Left on By Pass 4, Left on Rt 4, Right on High St. Right on St Rt 127, then Right on Wayne Milford.... home....


I didn't go over 20 mph the entire way. Some spots only 15 mph... and was getting passed by cars left and right!!! 


I got home at 4 AM this morning.... night of ice, being scared, and cold!!! But the night started out fun!!! 


Here's some pictures.... 


The first one is from Walmart's store doors!!!

 This one is from 127 after I had turned on it from High St!! Craziness!!!

 This one is on my road!! The worst of it all!!!! Yes, that's how dark my road is....

VIA Survey of Character Strengths

VIA Survey of Character Strengths

Here are your scores on the VIA Survey of Character Strengths. For how to interpret and use your scores, see the book Authentic Happiness. The ranking of the strengths reflects your overall ratings of yourself on the 24 strengths in the survey, how much of each strength you possess. Your top five, especially those marked as Signature Strengths, are the ones to pay attention to and find ways to use more often.

Your Top Strength

Spirituality, sense of purpose, and faith You have strong and coherent beliefs about the higher purpose and meaning of the universe. You know where you fit in the larger scheme. Your beliefs shape your actions and are a source of comfort to you.

Your Second Strength

Kindness and generosity You are kind and generous to others, and you are never too busy to do a favor. You enjoy doing good deeds for others, even if you do not know them well.

Your Third Strength

Fairness, equity, and justice Treating all people fairly is one of your abiding principles. You do not let your personal feelings bias your decisions about other people. You give everyone a chance.

Your Fourth Strength

Citizenship, teamwork, and loyalty You excel as a member of a group. You are a loyal and dedicated teammate, you always do your share, and you work hard for the success of your group.

Your Fifth Strength

Gratitude You are aware of the good things that happen to you, and you never take them for granted. Your friends and family members know that you are a grateful person because you always take the time to express your thanks.

Strength#6

Appreciation of beauty and excellence You notice and appreciate beauty, excellence, and/or skilled performance in all domains of life, from nature to art to mathematics to science to everyday experience.

Strength#7

Honesty, authenticity, and genuineness You are an honest person, not only by speaking the truth but by living your life in a genuine and authentic way. You are down to earth and without pretense; you are a "real" person.

Strength#8

Leadership You excel at the tasks of leadership: encouraging a group to get things done and preserving harmony within the group by making everyone feel included. You do a good job organizing activities and seeing that they happen.

Strength#9

Social intelligence You are aware of the motives and feelings of other people. You know what to do to fit in to different social situations, and you know what to do to put others at ease.

Strength#10

Capacity to love and be loved You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated. The people to whom you feel most close are the same people who feel most close to you.

Strength#11

Curiosity and interest in the world You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery.

Strength#12

Hope, optimism, and future-mindedness You expect the best in the future, and you work to achieve it. You believe that the future is something that you can control.

Strength#13

Humor and playfulness You like to laugh and tease. Bringing smiles to other people is important to you. You try to see the light side of all situations.

Strength#14

Industry, diligence, and perseverance You work hard to finish what you start. No matter the project, you "get it out the door" in timely fashion. You do not get distracted when you work, and you take satisfaction in completing tasks.

Strength#15

Love of learning You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn.

Strength#16

Creativity, ingenuity, and originality Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible.

Strength#17

Judgment, critical thinking, and open-mindedness Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely only on solid evidence to make your decisions. You are able to change your mind.

Strength#18

Zest, enthusiasm, and energy Regardless of what you do, you approach it with excitement and energy. You never do anything halfway or halfheartedly. For you, life is an adventure.

Strength#19

Bravery and valor You are a courageous person who does not shrink from threat, challenge, difficulty, or pain. You speak up for what is right even if there is opposition. You act on your convictions.

Strength#20

Modesty and humility You do not seek the spotlight, preferring to let your accomplishments speak for themselves. You do not regard yourself as special, and others recognize and value your modesty.

Strength#21

Perspective (wisdom) Although you may not think of yourself as wise, your friends hold this view of you. They value your perspective on matters and turn to you for advice. You have a way of looking at the world that makes sense to others and to yourself.

Strength#22

Caution, prudence, and discretion You are a careful person, and your choices are consistently prudent ones. You do not say or do things that you might later regret.

Strength#23

Self-control and self-regulation You self-consciously regulate what you feel and what you do. You are a disciplined person. You are in control of your appetites and your emotions, not vice versa.

Strength#24

Forgiveness and mercy You forgive those who have done you wrong. You always give people a second chance. Your guiding principle is mercy and not revenge.

New Year = New Beginnings.... maybe?

As 2011 comes to a close over this next week I will be praying about what my Heavenly Father has in store for me over the next year. I know there will be changes (some good, and maybe some not so good) in my life. New roads for me to go down, through, and to choose from.

I have recently made a semi-big business decision the Saturday after my birthday. Actually I've been praying about it for months now. But when I got home from the Good Sam Run Saturday December 17th it was as if God specifically told me what I already knew I had to do. Though my heart was heavy, and my reluctancy was totally kicking in, I wrote my "Up line" a letter telling them how wonderful they are. At times in writing this letter I got up and paced the floor, walked away from my room, and CRIED the entire tim I wrote this to them. I will not be selling Premier Designs Jewelry until further notice.

I have a lot on my plate as it is, and with having 10+ shows on my calendar since August... and ALL 10 have canceled on me with no re-bookings and my classes are getting a little harder and with that I need more time to study. There is family reasons too but I'm not posting those on here.

Being apart of Premier has allowed me, and helped me grow SOOO MUCH!! I can't even imagine not being apart of it any longer. My heart breaks more if I sit and think about it. The relationships, friendships, and love that has been birthed and grown because of Premier I pray continue on going even though I won't be an independent distributor. I know Premier will be there when I am ready to become apart of the company again. I just pray that the friendships continue.

I'm putting all of my worry, all of my stress, and all of my hopes into the Father's hands. My life is His!! He knows me better than I know myself.

Enlightened but so disheartening....

I have been at extremely hard work with my education since I graduated from Edgewood in 2000. I was given the opportunity to surrender my diploma back to my high school and continue on with my studies at Butler Tech in their Commercial Art program, tuition free. I graduated from there in 2002 with a certificate in Graphic Design. Wanting to pursue that career even further, I submitted my art portfolio to the "Art Forum Inc.", to attend there and obtain my Associate degree.

I started at the "Art Forum Inc." in the fall of 2003. This was by far the hardest endeavor that I have experienced. Not only did I have issues with my course work, but also my living situation was not the best. My first two roommates were nightmares. Every night I would come home to a “trial” of life, with them both questioning everything I am and what/who I believed in. These two 18 year olds thought they knew everything there was to living on their own. Me, 21 almost 22, had lived on my own for 2 to 3 years already. So, just imagine what these nights looked like when they badgered me. But that is not the reason for my paper, so I digress.

I graduated form the "Art Forum Inc." with my Associate’s in Graphic Design. I was not your “A+” student, however I was your average B-C student. When I was first looking at attending this school they specifically told me, “they help their graduated students find employment with in the graphic design field.” This was not true by any stretch of the imagination. I spent years applying, searching, and interviewing for jobs. No potential job leads were ever given to me, but rather a weekly email with links listed as to what was made available to the school’s secretary. I got these emailed to me via a search engine that both he and I were registered with. This was no help. The school has leads for their favorite students; I was not one of them. I know this now for a fact.

I had a hint back when I was a student there that they showed biasness, rather a specific person did, towards certain students. Last night I ran into an acquaintance that I had befriended while I attended this school. She and I spoke about how some of the things were done while I attended there. She told me how the president, Mr. Brock, “asked” the teachers if they would have a problem lowering a grade on a student’s art work so that the student would fail out. She told me how Mr. Brock and his son in-law, who also works in this "school," would sit and calculate a student’s grades so that Mr. Brock could kick them out.

Proving my point was when I had Mr. Brock for a drawing class on developing a book cover. I went to talk with him everyday about the class assignment to make sure that I did exactly what he wanted. Each time we would sit and talk he changed his mind on what he wanted me to do. Finally, fed up and really confused on what was being asked of me I brought a tape recorder with me to talk with him. He refused to talk to me when I had the recorder. He failed me, telling me that I did not do what he asked of me. This same marker rendering I took with me to the next level class. I ended up painting a picture for the main picture for the cover of this book. I scanned it into the computer and did this:



The instructor I had for this part of the project gave me a B on my work.

Finding out this information that this college was based on popularity makes me question myself as an artist, question my abilities in creating anything that should be or can be aesthetically pleasing to a person’s eye. I have been wondering about what others would think if they knew that the first college that I attended was a complete joke? Would they think that I am a joke, or a “wanna” be? I have a piece a paper hanging on my bedroom wall that cost me more than $50,000’s, I am now wanting to burn and I have a so-called portfolio that I thought I could stand on but now I feel as if it is just refrigerator art for mom to hang and throw away when it gets gross. Now, I question everything. The things that I am tremendously passionate about I now find myself questioning if I am even good at it.

I am sure that this is a grieving period that I am going to have to go through. But it is very sad that everything I have done, and claim to profess about my work I now question.

Mental Noting in My Brain

Okay so Thanksgiving is coming in like.... TWO days!!!!

18.31 lb Turkey - Bought
Fixings for: Cheese cake and Green Bean Casserole - Bought

Making tomorrow the cheese cakes and casserole and Mr Turkey Thursday morning (he's going in the oven)

Homework to complete over break:

EDT 256e - prepare for my group's "Teach the class" on Autism (11/28)
Write 3-5 pg paper from my field work (due 11/28)

EDT 182 - Research on Jupiter for group project
Moon observation(s) sheet

MTH 115 - STUDY FOR TEST ON THURSDAY DECEMBER 1ST
Homework in book and finish lab

ENG 112 - Painting for Project 5 (Final)
Write Journal #6 and Journal #10

I need to remember.... One thing at a time!!!!

I'm hoping to get started on my EDT paper while Mr. Turkey is cooking since I'll be up. I know one thing, that paper will be a little hard to write b/c of the dialects and cultural differences that will play into the child that I'm writing about's over all demeanor. Then again, I've dealt with worse... since my parents' were special needs foster parents for children and I have worked in school districts with kids with similar problems.

My ENG illustration is already started.... I just need to crank it out for this class. I will have to put the illustration that is on my easel on my bed while I'm working on this. Thank God the paint that is done on it is dry. It shouldn't take me long to finish (or so I pray).

MTH and EDT.... more/so busy work that can be worked on through daily, reviewing, researching, working on/through....

Finals in about 3 weeks....joy.....

FREAKING OUT!!! 1 month from today

Okay so it's officially not official as of yet but will be officially official in ONE MONTH from today. I join the group of 30 yr old age decade. Today I realized that I think that I'm freaking out because I've always envisioned myself being so much further along in my life {i.e. married, stable career, maybe had one child, in a house of my own with a garage for my car} but none of that has even started to happen, at least not that I can see as of yet.

I expressed some of my concerns with some of my amazing friends this morning at the Good Sam Run and my friend Mike suggested that I write my "birthday" list.... Now I have to admit that I haven't written this kind of list in a very long time.... I think the last time that I did I still believed in Santa.

I think one of the things that I really want is to be surrounded by the friends who I love. But I've tried to coordinate something like that before (like twice) and I don't want to have to "coordinate" something for myself. It just seems... um... too... forced or inwardly focused. That is not me (though some of the negative people that are unfortunately in my life may think differently). I'm just thinking and feeling like I am asking too much?

Some physical things that I could really use....

Since I've lost like 15 lbs.... okay "X" that... More like 30 pounds and literally NONE of my pants fit... so I would say gift certificates to get new pairs of jeans, dress pants, and kakis
My Cd/MP3 player in my car has been broken for over a year now (the one that came in the car... the factory one) I'd like a new one with an AUX port and a USB plug
I would like to get some new canvas(es)-blank because I'm almost finished with the BIG illustration that I've been working on for almost a year. I'm not sure what size(s) just yet though? I'm not to that point yet. But bigger than the 11x16 sizes.

More than anything I just don't want to spend this hypothetical "BIG" birthday alone. I hope I'm not asking too much?

Woke up this morning feeling a little low...

For some reason I've been thinking a lot about a conversation that I had with someone last Saturday. To be totally honest... it's made me want to cry since we've had it. I'm talking a "not" good cry.

I've been praying for my future husband now for a while. Not that I am complaining about God's timing, because I know that he's still working things out for him and I to be together. We're not ready yet for one another. This is not the reason for my post.

In this conversation, this person said that when they are thinking about dating someone that they look at the person of interest's background. As in what their parents do, if the parent's have a relationship with Jesus Christ (or not), how their siblings play a role in their life (if they had any), the parent's role at introducing Christ to this person of interest as well as the parent's involvement in the church; THEN does this person look at the person of interest's relationship with Jesus Christ, church activity, life styles, education and blah blah blah. This person lost me at the fact that they look at the parent's first to even consider the possibility of dating someone that I vaguely remember the rest of the conversation.

This really HURT!!! Obviously since I'm blogging about it now.... 5 days later.

I know my life is so FARRRRRR from perfect that if I even tried to match up to this person's standards I'd be so far buried in the mud, that I would be magma that is within the earth's core. Not that this person was of ANY interest to myself.

It just makes me wonder sometimes what "guys" actually see when they look at me and ONLY me (not my family)? My family has been shattered since the passing of my mom, and it only seems to be getting worse. From this conversation I had with this person, I am NOT encouraged but as well I am NOT enlightened on the dating aspect with anybody. I hope I don't seem to be "shattered" as well. I know who my sovereign King is. He is my one true God. He is etched within my very heart and is my one true identity.

I know and understand that we all have "standards," but seriously.... this is this person's?

I'm going to repost qualities that I have for the man of my dreams from my blog post on June 10, 2011. As well this is the scripture that I am continually praying over him and for our future so that we are blessings to each other:

Romans 1:8-12

I thank my God through Jesus Christ for you, because your faith is proclaimed in all the world. For God is my witness, whom I serve with my spirit in the gospel of his Son, that without ceasing I mention you always in my prayers, asking that somehow by God's will I may now at last succeed in coming to you. For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you—that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.

The Dream Man of Mine:
First and foremost he's got to know the Lord as his Savior & not just "know of the Lord." They need to walk together daily.
I want him to love me for being me, imperfections and all
He's got to be a man of character
Has dignity
Has his own personality
Is educated
Loves music- BOUNS if he can sing and play an instrument (guitar or piano)
Likes to cook- so we can cook together
Is older than me
Taller than me
Doesn't drink to get drunk but is a social drinker
Does NOT smoke (anything)
Has big hands- i.e. to hold me firmly but softly and to make me feel safe
Loves to read, camp, explore, drive
He loves to travel
Lives and outwardly focused life
Loves to volunteer in the community
Willing to pray with me and for others
Has goals in his life and things he would like to achieve with his wife.... me
Wants kids either biologically or adopted
Will challenge me daily to be a better person, woman, and Christian
A man who will lead me
A man who dresses nice but who can rock out wearing a T-shirt, plaid shorts and sandals
A man who will want to rip my clothes off of me every time he sees me, but respects me enough to keep that for our private times
A man who is close to his family, but knows when to be his own person without them
Who loves coffee
Who's a hopeless romantic
A man who inspires me
Loves to laugh and joke around
Wants to go on mission trips together
A man who can handle my overly dramatic family
Who dreams about me
Who prays for me even though we haven't met yet
Who takes challenges head on and doesn't run from them
Who is supportive of my dreams and goals
Who will make me breakfast in bed and spend the whole day laying around with me when I am sick
Someone who is willing to be late to work just to make me smile before he leaves
Someone who is willing to take a scenic route home just to see the sights and to spend more time with me
Who holds my face while he kisses me
Who sees me in his future